For real. Or so I think. I mean, the wishes of the universe(s?) are beyond me. And, yet, here I am.
Well, that's over let's get to more important things. Like that this year I'm actually going to (try to) become more social. No, stop rolling your eyes, people. Stop saying: Oh when have I heard that before (and answer: every year). This time, it's for real. I'll be *nice* to people. I'll go out more. I'll DO things. Whatever. I'll be social. I mean, I've lived here for almost three years and when people say "bring friends" (to BBQs or whatnots), I automatically think: but my friends live four hours/several continents away. That's not good, right? So, yes, Social. With a capital "S" even.
On that subject, I recently went to dinner with someone who should have been perfect for a potential friend. Like perfect. We did similar stuff (boring liberal arts-y academics), he'd lived in Asia, were both keen on animals (he has two cats--obviously we wouldn't ever be able to merge pets since Dog would pretty much eat said cats. But, still!) and, yet, it was quite possibly one of the most boring dinners of my life. And, as an academic, I've been to a fair few of those. I've had more fun talking about fishing with the chaps down at the pub than at a dinner with someone who (according to the wonders of the interwebs) is my "type". Hah, interwebs. You haven't figured out the key thing in all this getting together-ness. Let me tell you.
People don't want to hang out or live for foreever or stuff with people *just* like them. Wait, no. Some people might want that. Narcissistic bastards. But, most other people. Which is the majority of the people. Most other people want people who are different to them in some ways. Similar in others, of course. Especially if the goal is long-term friendship or getting together-ness (what *do* we call this anyway? Romance seems too fluffy. I don't buy that. Shacking up?). Imagine coming back home every day to someone *just* like you. In my case, it'd be someone who doesn't notice that there's dog hair everywhere. Who barely cooks. Who does laundry every couple of weeks (the basement is scary). Who lives more in the world of books and work rather than In Real Life (bah. WE all know Real Life sucks). In short, we don't want to live with us. And especially in the early stages of knowing someone else, we want to figure out what they enjoy that might be different. That we might learn about/from. At the pub the other day, there was a guy who had played rugby in various small towns in South America. I've never been to South America. I have no desire to ever go to South America. He'd never been to Thailand or anywhere in Southeast Asia. We sat around, talked rugby, talked travel and had far more fun. I came back with a list of random trivia about South America. He went home promising to try Thai food (he'd never had any! How is that possible!! I believe I told him that life is not worth living without ever having had good Thai food. How presumptuous is that! And yet how true).
Which sort of leads me to this. J.K. Rowling's claim that Harry and Hermione should have ended up together and that she regrets pairing up Hermione and Ron. This is obviously nuts since a) Weasley is our king (well, duh) and b) think of the Hermione-Ron pairing for a moment. In a series which subverts a lot of tropes, the Hermione-Ron thing just works for me (I"m talking about the books, not the films). Ron is not a magic user that's up to par with Hermione. But, he has what we'd probably call "street smarts" or whatever. He knows the magical world. He's grown up in it. He knows things about it that Hermione won't. Hermione doesn't need a partner who can help her with her magic--she's bloody Hermione! She can out magic anyone!! She needs a partner who is complementary. Who knows the everyday things about how the world of magic ticks. Being Harry's partner would have meant her life would be subsumed (word? buried? swallowed up by?) his. Harry is the star--he's the boy who lived. He's the boy who defeated Voldy. He's the damned hero. Being Harry's partner would mean Hermione couldn't be the Best Witch Evah. Because she'd always be just Harry's partner. And also they are just too similar--two muggle(ish) magic users. The only way Harry-Hermione works if it's a threesome with Ron.
Well, that's over let's get to more important things. Like that this year I'm actually going to (try to) become more social. No, stop rolling your eyes, people. Stop saying: Oh when have I heard that before (and answer: every year). This time, it's for real. I'll be *nice* to people. I'll go out more. I'll DO things. Whatever. I'll be social. I mean, I've lived here for almost three years and when people say "bring friends" (to BBQs or whatnots), I automatically think: but my friends live four hours/several continents away. That's not good, right? So, yes, Social. With a capital "S" even.
On that subject, I recently went to dinner with someone who should have been perfect for a potential friend. Like perfect. We did similar stuff (boring liberal arts-y academics), he'd lived in Asia, were both keen on animals (he has two cats--obviously we wouldn't ever be able to merge pets since Dog would pretty much eat said cats. But, still!) and, yet, it was quite possibly one of the most boring dinners of my life. And, as an academic, I've been to a fair few of those. I've had more fun talking about fishing with the chaps down at the pub than at a dinner with someone who (according to the wonders of the interwebs) is my "type". Hah, interwebs. You haven't figured out the key thing in all this getting together-ness. Let me tell you.
People don't want to hang out or live for foreever or stuff with people *just* like them. Wait, no. Some people might want that. Narcissistic bastards. But, most other people. Which is the majority of the people. Most other people want people who are different to them in some ways. Similar in others, of course. Especially if the goal is long-term friendship or getting together-ness (what *do* we call this anyway? Romance seems too fluffy. I don't buy that. Shacking up?). Imagine coming back home every day to someone *just* like you. In my case, it'd be someone who doesn't notice that there's dog hair everywhere. Who barely cooks. Who does laundry every couple of weeks (the basement is scary). Who lives more in the world of books and work rather than In Real Life (bah. WE all know Real Life sucks). In short, we don't want to live with us. And especially in the early stages of knowing someone else, we want to figure out what they enjoy that might be different. That we might learn about/from. At the pub the other day, there was a guy who had played rugby in various small towns in South America. I've never been to South America. I have no desire to ever go to South America. He'd never been to Thailand or anywhere in Southeast Asia. We sat around, talked rugby, talked travel and had far more fun. I came back with a list of random trivia about South America. He went home promising to try Thai food (he'd never had any! How is that possible!! I believe I told him that life is not worth living without ever having had good Thai food. How presumptuous is that! And yet how true).
Which sort of leads me to this. J.K. Rowling's claim that Harry and Hermione should have ended up together and that she regrets pairing up Hermione and Ron. This is obviously nuts since a) Weasley is our king (well, duh) and b) think of the Hermione-Ron pairing for a moment. In a series which subverts a lot of tropes, the Hermione-Ron thing just works for me (I"m talking about the books, not the films). Ron is not a magic user that's up to par with Hermione. But, he has what we'd probably call "street smarts" or whatever. He knows the magical world. He's grown up in it. He knows things about it that Hermione won't. Hermione doesn't need a partner who can help her with her magic--she's bloody Hermione! She can out magic anyone!! She needs a partner who is complementary. Who knows the everyday things about how the world of magic ticks. Being Harry's partner would have meant her life would be subsumed (word? buried? swallowed up by?) his. Harry is the star--he's the boy who lived. He's the boy who defeated Voldy. He's the damned hero. Being Harry's partner would mean Hermione couldn't be the Best Witch Evah. Because she'd always be just Harry's partner. And also they are just too similar--two muggle(ish) magic users. The only way Harry-Hermione works if it's a threesome with Ron.
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